Pensacola, Florida - Bernie Higgins, a Florida ice cream vendor, went to the bank every night and deposited thousands of dollars in his account. It seemed highly unusual for an ice cream vendor to be making so much money, especially since he was almost bankrupt a few months earlier. But it seemed like a simple formula - Ice cream with a distinct flavor in a hot climate - it became a virtual gold mine for Bernie. That is, until the Florida Food Inspection Agency became involved. On Tuesday last week, they analyzed three different samples of "Bernie's Eskimo Pie" and upon getting the results, Bernie's license to make and sell ice cream was immediately revoked.

Apparently, Bernie had been using his Eskimo friends to help make the ice cream, and they also supplied the secret ingredient - Eskimo Spit. An analysis showed that apart from the cream and milk used in the product, 30 % Eskimo spit was mixed into the formula. The compound was left to ferment for 3 days, and at that point it would be treated like conventional ice cream.

Bernie went to great lengths to get only premium Eskimo Spit for his concoction. His visits to Killugemut, in Iceland, were to hire Eskimos who were willing to help supply the vast quantities of Eskimo Spit he needed to supply the manufacturing process. For the most part, only male Eskimos were chosen for the task, due to the unique bittersweet flavor their spit had - "I know what the best spit is, so I knew where to go and get it.." said Bernie, after his license was revoked. He also mentioned that for the entire month of march, his ice-cream contained Eskimo Shnotz. In fact, the analysis did indicate that a small amount of shnotz was found in the ingredients. However, Bernie stated that the although the flavor was good, the mucus tended to congeal and that was unacceptable if the quality was to be maintained.

The Florida State Food Authority declined to add any comments to the statement the issued, except that " alot of Eskimos made ALOT of money sptting in Bernie's ingredient vat, but it's not going to continue." They are investigating to see whether Bernie had ever used other restricted ingredients in his products.

Above: Bernie's Ice-cream cart offered flavors with such a unique taste, that customers lined up for two city blocks...

"When I asked Bernie what the secret ingredient was, he laughed and told me the treats contained REAL Eskimos....what a comedian !!"

                                                       Dan Mandez
                                                   Customer
                                                                                                  

"Bernie traveled to Iceland every weekend..on business. Why the heck would anyone go there on business ? "

                                           
                                                             Bart Frank
                                                          Customer
                                                                                        
"He always had new Eskimo friends staying over...I always wondered why they liked him so much. "

                                           
                                                            Simon Zubbee
                                                  Neighbor