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| Consumer Tip On What Not To Buy! |
News Brief | |||
Please Lord...HELP me !! This mashed potato mix has blocked my insides up and I think I need a stomach transplant. Who's doing the testing at the Betty Crocker Kitchens ? Geologists ? The last time I had something like this to eat, I was trapped in my basement and had to eat my kid's modeling clay to stay alive. By God, have the supermarkets ever stooped this low before ? The box says that this is a cheesy type of mash potato mix - someone must have slipped a couple of grams of quick bond cement into my box. I ate this stuff Saturday, and I have yet to "go" to the toilet. If this keeps up, I probably won't be able to write this column tomorrow cause I'll be in the hospital getting my stomach pumped. Wish me luck.
"I used this stuff to fix the crack in my foundation - works great !!" John Harcourt "If you want to send your guests home real quick, serve this stuff...they'll never come back again..." Mary Hinnesset -Opinions are sent in
by MudPile visitors- |
Woman divorces Lazy husband - Marries Monkey Man Dallas - A 71 year old woman identified as Linda Haywood was married to the infamous monkey man featured in our May 13th issue ( Monkey man story ). " As soon as I read about his tragedy, I instantly fell in love with the man..." says Linda about her new found love. She had just been divorced from her ex husband, whom she described as a "lazy deadbeat who never worked a day in his life". The monkey man was extremely pleased with the union, although state officials are still investigating whether he was properly divorced from his wife. The couple is presently in Hawaii celebrating their honeymoon, and they have been treated like VIP's wherever they go. Says the monkey man - " I felt my fur rise as soon as I met her, and in monkey language, that means she's a knockout !". Most people have been supportive, although several church officials have expressed outrage that a monkey and a women can unite in holy matrimony. Linda says that her pastor had no problem with the marriage - "He was always ready to unite any couple who felt they were in love...and we are just that - in 100 % LOVE...". |
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